The Emperor's New Clothes, Fractured Fairy Tail #8

Once upon a time

there was a very vain emperor

He was so conceited

he would stare for hours

at his reflection

He would primp and preen endlessly before his mirror

never being satisfied

until perfection was achieved

Two nefarious creatures

classic n'er-do-wells

were looking

to make a quick buck

They heard of this Emperor's vanity

and decided to pay him a visit

they started a PR campaign

announcing that they were the premier fashion designers in all the land

The Emperor upon hearing this news

invited them both to his palace

"We are the best courturiers in the world."

"Oh yes, after many years of research and study we have woven the most incredible fabric!"

"This fabric is so light and finely made that it appears to be invisible to those too common to appreciate it's quality!"

“Oh yes, yes, yes! Stupid, ignorant people cannot see it's beauty!”

The emperor was very impressed and ordered a suit to be made of this wonderous material

and gave these two scoundrels each

a bag of gold for their commission 

The two con artists returned a week later with the new suit

"Behold Emperor! Here is your most fabulous suit!"

"Oohhhh, isn't it the most gorgeous thing you have ever seen!?!"

"The quality is beyond belief! Try it on, your Highness!"

The Emperor quickly undressed, excited to own such exquisite work  

They draped the invisible clothing on the Emperor

"Oh your Highness, you look marvelously regal!"

"Oh yes! Yes! YES! Incredibly impressive and majestic!"

The Emperor thought the material might be just a bit see-through

but didn't want to mention it be for he didn't want to appear common so he exclaimed on how glorious he looked

and the scoundrelly villains

went laughing all the way to the bank

The Emperor decided to show everyone his magical new suit

Parading through the main hall he strutted grandly before the crowd that had gathered

“Look at the Emperor’s new clothes!” one woman said
“Is he naked?” another whispered

“I cannot look!” A shy miss exclaimed
“OH, How grand he is!” a grand dame admired

“Saints preserve us!” shouted one older woman

"Oh the cut!" commented one man
"And the color!" the other replied

Everyone in the crowd commented on how magnificent the Emperor looked, not wishing to appear common or ignorant

Until one small girl burst out with what everyone really was thinking

“HE’S NAKED!”

The crowd gasped in horror

But the girl said

"Why is that pervy man walking around without any clothes on?"

"Isn’t there laws against that???"

Realizing that the Emperor actually WAS nude, they all recoiled in distaste

All except one little minx

who was checking the Emperor out

and noticed he had the whole package

She thought “He’s an emperor and he’s HOT!”

She quickly stripped down and joined him

"I know just the place for us!" she explained

So they went off to join the nudist colony

and lived happily every after

THE END!